


so hot you're hurting my feelings

by dartmouth420



Series: break up with ur girlfriend [2]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Apologies, Developing Relationship, Drama, F/F, Lesbian AU, Mild Praise Kink, Polyamory Negotiations, Porn With Plot, Smut, Strap-Ons, Threesome - F/F/F, big chaotic dumbass energy, but she's really trying this time, lying, raven's unreliable moral compass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:33:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25897501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dartmouth420/pseuds/dartmouth420
Summary: Raven is hesitant to call it a relationship, but whatever the hell is happening with herself, Raja and Manila is really, really great. But Raven's past actions are coming back to bite her and not in a hot way. Can she manage to reconcile her mistakes without everything collapsing disastrously?note: this is a direct sequel to 'break up with ur girlfriend, i'm bored' and it'll be more fun if you read that first :)
Relationships: Sutan Amrull | Raja/Manila Luzon/Raven
Series: break up with ur girlfriend [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1879315
Comments: 12
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i figured 'break up with ur girlfriend' didn't feel fully resolved and needed a sequel. this should fill in some plot holes, provide more character development and hopefully satisfy the story arc! the first chapter is mostly smut lmao, enjoy. title from the song by caroline polachek.

Raven had the feeling this was going to become a problem. 

Well, maybe not _exactly_ a problem. 

"Nothing can stop her, can it?" murmured Raja as they watched Manila on the dance floor from the table they occupied at the club. It was a Friday, and the club was loud and crowded. The music was questionable but the drinks were flowing. It had been a a few weeks since Raven had met the couple, and the three of them had been spending plenty of time together.

Raven followed Raja's gaze and watched Manila moving her body to the rhythm, curly hair bouncing. Her tight, high-waisted jean shorts showing off her glorious legs.

"How does she even have this much energy?" commented Raven, sipping her drink. 

Raven was taking a break from dancing, because her amazing shoes weren't the most comfortable. Manila always wore sneakers so she could dance endlessly, but Raven liked the extra few inches of height that heels gave her. Despite that, Raja was still taller than them both.

Somebody danced close to Manila, and she turned, giving the other woman a smile, touching her waist, inviting her in closer. Raven glanced to Raja, who stared at Manila hungrily, eyes darkening. 

"So," asked Raven, smoothing the bottom of her tight black dress over her thighs, "It doesn't bother you, the way she flirts with everyone?"

"No, it doesn't," replied Raja, tucking a loose strand of long grey-black hair behind her ear, "That's just the way she is, she lives for attention. Neither of us actually do anything with other people without communicating first."

"Mm-hmm," said Raven, "Didn't quite go that way the night you met me. You were ready to fight me in the bathroom." 

She fixed Raja with a smirk, challenging, recalling her attempt to seduce Manila and fuck with the couple. Which, after some good-old-fashioned healthy communication, had turned into actually fucking the couple.

Raja let her gaze roll up and down Raven's body, before resting on her eyes. Raven shifted, crossing her legs. The way Raja looked at her was always exciting.

"You're an exception. The whole jealous girlfriend thing is mostly for Manila's benefit," said Raja, with a small smile, "It's like role-play. Obviously it's a careful line to walk, with any actual feelings of jealousy that might come up. But she loves it." Raja shrugged and inclined her head towards the dance floor. "Look, every so often she'll glance back at us, to make sure we're watching. Like I said, she lives for attention."

Hmm, interesting. Raven looked for Manila again on the dance floor. 

Manila was at the edge of the crowd, flirting with a different woman, tall with long dark hair and straight bangs. Raven stiffened, recognizing her. The woman took Manila by the hand and pulled her to the dance floor. Manila shot a knowing glance back at Raja and Raven, and then followed the woman, dancing close to her, letting herself be touched. 

Raven's eyes narrowed. 

"I know her. That woman she's with."

"Oh, really? Who is she?"

"My nemesis," breathed Raven.

"Wait, what?" asked Raja, confusion and amusement appearing on her face, "Are you joking?"

"No," stated Raven, standing and leaving the table.

Raven smoothed out her dress and approached, stalking the two women on the dance floor like prey. If Manila wanted a show of possessiveness Raven could certainly give her that, but she had to play it just right. She certainly couldn't let her feelings about her _nemesis, Tatianna,_ get in the way. Raja was watching closely from the table. 

Tatianna and Raven had dated, briefly and disastrously, a couple of years ago and from then on out it had been full blown rivalry. They worked in the same industry for competing companies, which meant every so often they'd see one another at work-related events. As the competition heightened both personally and professionally, each wanted to one-up the other at any given opportunity. And Raven was determined to win.

Manila was speaking into Tatianna's ear, leaning in close to be heard over the music. Tatianna was too busy paying attention to Manila to notice Raven over her shoulder. Raven snuck up behind Manila and circled her waist with her hands, gently pulling her back from Tatianna. Manila started, then recognized Raven and relaxed, leaning back into her luxuriously. Raven planted a possessive kiss on the muscle between Manila's neck and shoulder, leaving a dark lipstick stain. 

Raven looked right into Tatianna's eyes and said, "Hi Tati, I see you've met Manila."

Raven felt Manila's slight intake of breath, and unconscious shiver. Yes, Raven had played her cards right. Raven resisted grinning, her grip tight on Manila's waist, holding her close.

"Raven," said Tatianna, expression falling into haughty disgust, "So we meet again."

Raven carefully maintained eye contact with Tatianna and pressed another kiss to Manila's jaw. 

Manila's eyelids fluttered and she managed to say, "Sorry, I'm taken, haha. It was nice to meet you…"

Tatianna rolled her eyes and stepped back, disappearing into the crowd. Raven finally did smile, victorious, and turned Manila around and kissed her properly. Manila responded, balling her hands into Raven's straight blonde hair and deepening the kiss, pushing her thigh between Raven's legs. 

Fuck, this girl was good. Manila broke the kiss.

"Congrats, you caught me," whispered Manila, "You wanna make out in the bathroom real quick?"

Raven blinked. She did, as a matter of fact. Badly. But she wanted to take Manila home with Raja even more.

"You've been a bad girl, flirting with my nemesis," whispered Raven into Manila's ear, sliding her hand down Manila's back to squeeze her denim-covered ass, "Bad girls deserve to be punished."

Manila gave her an absolutely shit-eating grin and laughed, "Your nemesis? Really?" 

Raven broke her cool and laughed, straightening up. Manila turned, leading Raven by the hand back to the table where Raja was observing, elbows on the table with one hand propping up her chin, a single eyebrow raised.

"That was interesting," commented Raja, as Raven and Manila slid in on either side of her. Manila cuddled in to Raja's side, rubbing her thigh as Raja put her arm around her. Manila was so physical, always wanting to touch and be touched. It was like ridiculous, extended foreplay. It was endlessly satisfying to give Manila the love she so openly craved. 

"Apparently I've been a bad girl," whined Manila to Raja, pouting, "And I need to be punished."

"Oh, so it's that kind of night?" replied Raja, looking to Raven, who nodded. Raja took Raven's hand and squeezed it, giving her a look of approval. Raven had played the role correctly then, with exciting results. Exciting results that were going straight to the mounting tension between her legs. 

"So are you going to explain the whole _nemesis_ thing, or-?"

"Maybe later," suggested Raven with a sly smile. "Let's get out of here."

-

Raven attempted to remove her extremely fashionable but rather painful shoes at Raja and Manila's apartment, but Manila insisted on pushing her against the wall and making out with her, which was pleasantly entertaining. Apparently Raven's possessive display at the club had done something for Manila because she couldn't keep her hands off. Again.

Raven happily rolled her eyes to herself while Manila kissed her neck, because this was how it had been going lately. The three of them would go out and come home, have absolutely lovely sex and then- here was the difficult part- they'd also have absolutely lovely mornings, enjoying each other's company. The lovely mornings turned in to lovely afternoons, which turned into lovely evenings and then more nights. Raja and Manila were generous, and invited her to hang out, to have meals and do activities and just generally spend time with them. 

The whole thing was so goddamned _lovely_ it was making Raven stressed out. Spending time with the someone(s) she was having sex with usually wasn't Raven's style. Raven was more of a leave-immediately-because-feelings-are-for-the-weak kind of woman.

"Give her a minute, babe," said Raja mildly, from somewhere behind Manila, heading through into the apartment proper. 

Manila stepped back and finally let Raven take her shoes off, and when she moved back in to touch her again Raven darted out of the entryway into the main room of the apartment.

"Hey!" yelped Manila, chasing after her with a giggle.

The apartment was open-concept, and Raven dodged around the kitchen island, while Manila chased her, laughing, her curly hair bouncing. Raja was elsewhere, maybe in the bedroom or the bathroom. Manila lunged and Raven managed to keep away.

Raven paused, watching Manila, who was practically stumbling with gasps of laughter, as she reached again for Raven and missed. Raven felt quite pleased with herself, teasing Manila, and then a hand closed around her upper arm. 

"Caught you."

Raja had snuck up on her, and Raven looked up into her smug, possessive expression and felt a rush of arousal through her entire being.

And then Raven was trapped with her back against the counter, Raja kissing her aggressively, hands gripping her upper arms. 

"Get up on the counter," she ordered, and Raven sprang to obey, because there was something so, so hot about when Raja took charge. Raven easily hoisted herself up on the counter, her dress already riding up. 

Manila watched from a few feet away, laughter fading, and moved closer as Raja pushed Raven's legs open, pressing her body between them, and kissed her jaw. Ravens breath was shallow, and she shut her eyes as Manila crept up next to them, sliding her hand up Raven's thigh and reaching between her legs. Raven could've absolutely melted. 

"Not yet."

Raven opened her eyes. Manila wore a guilty expression and Raja was gripping the wrist of her questing hand. 

"You can watch from over there," purred Raja, gently pushing Manila back, who whined a complaint and complied, a few feet from them. Raven inhaled sharply, and Raja smelt like breath mints, perfume and that individual scent of her own skin. 

Raja yanked Raven's dress up over her hips, and Raven rocked forward to help as Raja pulled Raven's underwear down to her knees. The counter was cold against her naked ass, but she barely felt it as Raja dropped to her knees and pushed her legs open further, leaving delicate bites on her thighs. And then she went in for it, and Raven leaned back, supporting herself with one hand, bringing the other up cover her mouth to cover her gasp at the contact.

A small whine returned her attention to Manila, who was leaning against the kitchen island. Manila's entire body was tense, her thighs pressed together as she watched Raja eat Raven out on the counter. Raven knew this must be absolute torture for her, to just watch quietly without any attention being paid to her, and that realization sent a tingle right down Raven's spine that landed right where Raja was doing some very excellent things with her mouth. 

Fuck, _oh fuck._

And Raven was already feeling it, already getting close way too quickly, and Manila made eye contact with her, her hands balling into fists and Raven suddenly felt deeply vulnerable, as Raja placed a steadying hand on her thigh. This was a lot.

"Fuck, I think I'm getting close-"

Raja hummed acknowledgement against her and it made Raven feel like she'd faint.

"Get your ass off my counter," ordered Raja, pulling back. 

Cursing, on edge, way too fucking aroused to think, Raven slid off the counter onto unsteady legs and pulled her dress down, glaring at Raja. Raja stood tall and pointed one long, commanding arm to the the bedroom door. 

"Bedroom. Now."

Manila took Raven's hand and led her, stumbling, pushing the door open and throwing herself on the bed. Raven went down with her, and let Manila roll her on her back, climbing on top of her and kissing her frantically. Manila groped at Raven's dress, Raven wriggled out of it and scrabbled at Manila's clothes as well. It was messy, frantic, and Raven felt like a hormonal teenager again. Raja followed them, watching approvingly as she patiently removed her own clothing, folding it and placing it on the back of a chair.

"I want to fuck you with the strap-on," murmured Raja.

"Oh god, yes," breathed Manila, turning and looking up at her, "Can you use the blue one-"

"Not you, babe," replied Raja with absolutely evil grin as she pulled a plastic bin out from under their bed with their sex toys rattling around in it. 

"Are you kidding me?" whined Manila, "You haven't given me _anything_ yet-"

"I can't leave poor Raven on edge like this, even I'm not that cruel."

Raven could hardly fucking think, but she nodded to Raja, making quick eye contact as Raja did up the leather straps on the harness around her hips. She could feel her own heartbeat pulsing between her legs. 

"But why are you ignoring me…?" pouted Manila, sitting up and facing Raja. Raven quickly followed her up, brushing Manila's hair away from her neck. Raven pressed her chest against Manila's back and kissed the spot between her neck and her shoulder where the dark lipstick stain remained from earlier in the evening.

"Because you've been a bad girl-" Raven murmured into Manila's ear, thrilled that she wasn't the only one being left on edge. Apparently Raja was delighting in torturing the two of them tonight and Raven loved it, it was so fucking hot, why hadn't she been sleeping with these people earlier? "-and you deserve to be punished."

Manila let out a breath that was a combination of frustration and pure arousal and Raven would have just pushed her down on her back and fucked her right then and there if the waiting hadn't been part of the game.

"Exactly."

They both looked up. Raja knelt on the bed, harness on around her hips and ready to go, a blue dildo attached. 

"But _I_ like the blue one… " complained Manila.

"Get yourself ready," said Raja to Raven, ignoring Manila. Raven obeyed instantly, shifting away from Manila, reaching down to touch herself, and she was already so, so ready, it wouldn't take much. Manila whined, somewhere in her peripheral vision. Raja was staring at her, intent, a bottle of lube in her left hand. 

"Turn around."

Another jolt of pure fire hit Raven at the command in Raja's voice, and she obeyed immediately, turning around and getting on her hands and knees.

"Mm-hmm, good," murmured Raja, stroking Raven's ass. Suddenly the room was filled with a low buzz. Oh shit, it vibrates, thought Raven wildly. She wasn't going to last long. Something about Raja's confident direction was making her absolutely lose her mind. Raven did in fact have a dominant side, but that was not being expressed tonight. Tonight she was getting fucked.

So she stayed down on her hands and knees, glanced over her shoulder at Raja and said, "Okay, I'm ready. Fuck me."

Raja did, gently guiding the lube-slicked appendage into her. Raven's mouth fell open, it felt amazing. She glanced to her right. Manila was watching them again, biting her lip.

Raja thrust into her experimentally, murmuring encouragement until they caught the right rhythm and Raven let out a moan. Raja was making small noises as well and Raven realized the opposite end of the vibrating strap-on must be rubbing against her clit. Everything felt unbelievably good, Raven's entire body was hot and flushed.

"You're- you're so good, you're perfect," praised Raja, breath heavy, digging her fingers into Raven's hip. It was all Raven could do not to beg Raja to fuck her harder, and soon enough she gave in and did.

And Raja was hitting the perfect spot and Raven approached her crescendo and fell over it, seeing stars, cursing, curling her chin to her chest. She was probably making all kinds of ridiculous noises but what did it matter? Raja pulled back, sitting back on her heels. Raven collapsed face down in the pillows, dizzy and shaking. That had been the best orgasm since… in… ever?

But Manila was still next to them, driven to distraction, her entire body clenched tight. Raven turned, watching Manila with one eye, her face shoved into the pillow. Manila was pawing at Raja as she undid the harness. 

"Raja, come on, please, it's my turn," begged Manila, and it made Raven smile, "Why are you taking it off? I want you to fuck me…"

"'Cause you can't use it on two people in a row baby, that's unsanitary," said Raja, voice ragged, tossing the harness over the edge of the bed and Raven wondered if the experience of fucking her had taken Raja to the same place Raven currently was. Her pussy was sore but her entire body felt like it was glowing. She was way too tired to move.

"Haven't I been punished enough?"

"Just fuck her, Raja," murmured Raven, with her face in the pillow, "She's been so good."

"Mmm, if you say so," replied Raja, gathering Manila in her lap and kissing her while Manila ground against Raja's thigh. Raja dumped her on the back and Manila giggled as Raja kissed down her torso and started to eat her out.

Manila was finally getting what she wanted, gasping as Raja got her fingers involved. But apparently it wasn't enough because Manila was reaching over to Raven, and Raven responded, trying to focus. She was fading, but she managed to shift over to kiss Manila and stroke her neck and play with her nipples. It would've been overstimulating for herself, considered Raven, but Manila always wanted as much touch and attention as possible. 

Manila's breath became unsteady, and she arched her back, coming undone. She tangled a hand on Raven's hair and pulled her in close, their faces together, half-kissing, Manila's hot breath against Raven's cheek. There was something shockingly intimate to it-

Then Manila was finished, and rolled on her side as Raja sat back up, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand. Manila curled into Raven and giggled, kissing her while reaching back to hold Raja's hand. Raven relaxed, lying back. Raja watched them, stroking Manila's hip, eyelids heavy and lazy. 

"Was that good?" asked Raja, affection in her low voice.

"It was _so good._ You two are so fucking hot," sighed Raven, soft and languid, "You're so hot it's hurting my feelings."

They both laughed and Manila kissed Raven's cheek. Then there was the process of getting up, going to the bathroom and washing up, then actually getting ready for bed. But once that was done and Raja pulled the blankets around them and the couple cuddled her between them, the warm glow that Raven thought would fade seemed to have lodged itself somewhere under her ribs. Raven did not usually experience feelings like this. Raven was typically a cold bitch.

But for some reason, listening to Raja and Manila breathing on either side of her in the blue darkness of their bedroom was oddly comforting.

Yes, this was definitely going to be a problem.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven experiences… guilt? Regret for her actions? That's new. She doesn't like it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in which raven is emotionally illiterate and there's a big argument. will our favourite throuple survive?!?!

The bad part of falling in love or whatever, thought Raven later that week, as she sat on the couch at Raja and Manila's apartment and stroked Manila's hair in the lovely afternoon sun, was that it made her want to be a better person. 

And Raven wasn't exactly competitive in the being-a-great-person league. In fact, she was probably filing her nails in the stands and not even watching the match. 

To further extend the sports metaphor, she briefly considered that Manila was, if not scoring a winning goal, then at least providing a solid offence, and that Raja was probably an umpire or a referee or something. But sports metaphors really shouldn't be trusted, so Raven dismissed the idea and refocused on Manila, who was resting with her head in Raven's lap, eyes closed. Raja was occupied in the kitchen, cooking something that already smelled amazing. Raja could cook like a goddamn professional chef, like a real adult. She even grew her own tomato plants on their balcony. Hopefully Raven would be invited to stay for dinner.

Raven did seem to be invited to stay for dinner a lot lately, which was a good thing because she'd never had a knack in the kitchen and had a tendency to burn everything. She'd largely survived off pop tarts, mac n cheese and pre-made salads up until this point.

Manila opened her eyes and Raven snapped back into the present, looking down at her. Manila was so fucking cute, generous with her affection, open-minded, weird and genuine, just amazing-

Raven leaned down and kissed the end of her nose.

"Aw!" said Manila, shifting happily in Raven's lap.

An obnoxious ringtone played out from the coffee table, next to where they were on the couch. Manila made a face and sat up, answering her phone.

"Mom?" said Manila, looking down, phone pressed to her ear. Raven picked up her own phone from next to her and checked her notifications. A few messages from Jujubee, as always. Raven replied with some select memes. Manila got up and walked quickly to the window, the arm that wasn't holding the phone across her chest.

"No… I thought you didn't- yeah. Yeah." Raven raised her head. Manila's tone was worried.

Raja came in from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel. Her eyebrows came together as she took in the scene.

"It's her mom?" she whispered to Raven, who nodded and shrugged. Raja frowned and went over, putting a hand on Manila's back.

"Well, no. No," continued Manila, her shoulders hunched forward, "I didn't think of that… when? Tomorrow? I'm not- no! Yes, of course."

Raven decided now would be a good time to use the bathroom and rose, leaving the scene. Manila's voice was anxious, pained. All from a call from her mother? That was unusual. But then Raven remembered what Raja had said to her in the car, the morning after they'd met. Manila's family was quite religious and homophobic. They didn't approve of her relationship, or the way she lived her life. Hmmm. Obviously it was worse than Raven had imagined. 

Guilt tugged at her, slightly, an unpleasant new feeling. The revelation that Manila was actually Jujubee's second cousin, the morning after she'd met the couple, loomed in her mind. So did the photo she'd sent. That had been a bad call, especially considering that while Jujubee was a lovely, excellent, accepting human being, there were clearly other members of Manila's immediate family out there who weren't. Sending that photo had been an invasion of privacy. Raven pressed her lips together and looked at herself in the mirror. 

Relationships shouldn't start out with lies. 

Raven knew that, but then again she never intentionally started relationships.

After what she imagined was an appropriate period of time she came back out of the bathroom, creeping through the kitchen to the living room. Manila had hung up and was speaking to Raja, expression drawn and worried. Raja pulled her in to her chest, resting her chin on top of Manila's head.

Raven cleared her throat and asked, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," replied Manila, sighing, "I'm fine. I just- dealing with my mother can be hard."

"Her mother is a bigot who uses evangelical Christian nonsense to justify harassing us," said Raja, angry, "She treats Manila like crap, _she's the worst-_ "

"Raja, stop it, she's still my mom," snapped Manila. 

"Sorry," murmured Raja, kissing the top of her head, "I just don't like it, babe."

Perhaps it was time for Raven to leave. Emotions weren't her forte.

But Manila moved across the room to Raven, wrapping her arms around her waist and resting her head on her shoulder, sighing. 

"Uh," said Raven, as confusing warmth flooded her chest and she awkwardly patted Manila's back. An odd combination of guilt and protectiveness rose in her. "I could leave, or-?"

Manila pulled back and gave her a small smile, "I'd like it if you stayed."

"Okay."

Raja gave her an approving, trusting look from behind Manila as she moved past them and back into the kitchen. 

The guilt tugged at Raven a little harder.

-

_hey what's the deal with manila's mom?_ texted Raven to Jujubee, the next day. 

_the aunt who's technically my cousin? she's a real piece of work lmao_

_yeah, she called manila when i was over the other day. manila was upset, idk_

_damn. yeah so my mom's half-sister from my grandpa's first marriage is manila's grandma. she ran away from laos with an evangelical catholic filipino guy in the 60s, it was a whole thing. so manila's mom is my cousin, and manila's my second cousin. that whole side of the family are total jesus freaks now lol. why are u asking?_

Raven sighed, crossing one leg over the other in her position on the kitchen chair. This was very complicated.

_always love hearing about ur family history, remember the pic I sent you where you recognized manila?_

_lmao yeah?_

_yeah, i think i gotta say something about it_

Jujubee didn't reply immediately, and Raven tapped her nails on the kitchen table impatiently. She got up, rummaged in the cupboard for a pop tart and put it in the toaster.

_raja and manila don't know u sent anything to me?_ came Jujubee's response.

_i told raja i made the connection between u and manila thru instagram..._

_bitch you lied??_

_yeah?? what else was i gonna do, i'd just met them!_

Raven was between a rock and a hard place. And normally, nothing would happen. The 'pics or it didn't happen' joke would stay between her and Jujubee as it always did, they'd both delete the photo later and neither of them would ever see the person involved again. No harm done, right?

_u interrupt my peaceful evening with this drama…_

_ughh i know_

_come over, lets have some wine_

_ok I'm just heating up a pop tart_

_bring me one_

Raven huffed a quiet laugh, confirmed and put her phone down. She crossed her legs at the kitchen table and waited for her pop tart to be done. 

"Hi, Raven… "

Raven looked up to see her roommate Nicole, who smiled shyly as she walked into the kitchen in pyjama pants and put some water in the kettle to boil. The other woman was always coming and going from the kitchen, making tea. Raven wasn't sure if constant tea-drinking was a southern thing, or maybe it was just because this climate was colder than Atlanta. 

"How're things going with you?" asked Nicole.

"I'm fine, just a bit stressed," replied Raven, thinking of her situation. 

"Oh, sorry to hear that."

"It's fine, I'm leaving for Juju's in a bit."

"Well, let me know if there's anything I can do!"

Raven avoided eye contact. Nicole was a lovely, kind person who always went out of her way to offer condolences, lend help, and give Raven compliments. But her unreciprocated crush on Raven was nothing if not blindingly obvious.

"Your hair looks real nice today," Nicole added, with a soft smile. 

The toaster popped and Raven stood, fumbling the hot pop tart onto a plate, giving Nicole a quick smile and thank you before retreating to her room to wolf the pop tart and leave. The rent here was cheap, but she really needed to move out. She was getting too old for this.

-

After the conversation with Jujubee, Raven procrastinated for a few days. But the opportunity to admit what she'd done and clear up her guilt presented itself sooner than expected. 

It was a Saturday night, which meant going to Raja and Manila's place, both for the sex and the company. There was an unspoken energy between the three of them. Raven felt herself becoming more and more intertwined with them, as they included one another in both the exciting and the mundane aspects of their lives. Manila had even come by Raven's apartment once, when her roommates were conveniently out. That had been a bit stressful because Raven had had a not-insignificant amount of laundry on her floor that day and Manila wanted to look at all her stuff. Raven didn't particularly enjoy vulnerability.

Raven found herself staring at Manila as she laughed in the middle of telling some complicated story. Manila was insanely beautiful, and super funny and hadn't even been bothered by the state of Raven's laundry, which was saying something. The three of them were sitting around Raja and Manila's kitchen table, drinking wine, and still trying to decide if they were going to the club or not.

"-and then I said, 'no, not the cuttlefish!' and my aunt dropped it, and it went everywhere," laughed Manila, and then she looked right at Raven, "But hey, you know my cousin Jujubee, right? I think she's technically my aunt, even though we're like the same age."

Raven blinked. Manila was smiling, expecting a reply. 

"Right! Yeah, she's my best friend, we met in college."

"That's so funny, it's like this is a small town or something," joked Manila, "I'm not in touch with that side of my family, even though I think they're like more chill and accepting than mine."

"Well, I'm a huge dyke, as you know," said Raven, glancing between the couple. Raja laughed, and eyed Raven over the edge of her wine glass. Raven continued, "I doubt my friendship with her would've lasted this long if she couldn't handle that."

"I should really get in touch with her," mused Manila, "It would be nice to like not hide from some of my family. Though I guess if this continues I will meet her, since she's your best friend!" She gave Raven a charming smile.

Raven shrugged, "Yeah, probably."

"How did you realize the connection, again?"

Raja was watching curiously, a lazy hand on Manila's waist. The guilt tugged violently at Raven.

"I, well." Raven struggled. Manila's head was cocked to one side. She should probably just admit to it now and get it over with. Honesty was supposedly the best policy. They would probably just think it was a funny coincidence, it could easily be written off as a joke, right?

"Juju and I have this like, inside joke," said Raven, fishing out her phone from the pocket of her jeans, "You know, cause we're both such terrible whores." She paused, allowing for the couple to laugh, again, "And so… " she drew out the word. 

"Whenever either of us hook up with someone new, we send each other a picture, like as proof. 'Pics or it didn't happen,' right?"

"Wait, what?" said Manila, her smile fading.

Raven's stomach was hot, and she quickly drew up the picture on her phone. The one from the morning after they'd first met, with her eye in the corner and Manila and Raja asleep behind her. She handed it to Manila, who frowned in shock, and Raja glanced at it over her shoulder, eyebrows drawing together.

"So she recognized you, Manila," said Raven, quickly, as the tension in the room grew, "But obviously she deleted it, and she sends me photos of the guys she hooks up with all the time, so-"

Manila frown changed to confusion. But Raja's expression was livid, a thundercloud, and she tossed Raven's phone down on the table.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" demanded Raja, standing. Hot shame built in Raven's stomach and she knew this had been a very, very bad idea. 

"Raven?" asked Manila, hurt, eyes wide. 

"I-" Raven didn't have a reason. Expression defensively blank, she attempted to justify it, "It's just an inside joke between us, I didn't think-"

"Yeah, _you didn't think,_ obviously!" snapped Raja, and she paced back and forth a few times, grimacing. Then she stopped, pointed at the door and spat, "Get out. Go."

Raven stood, grabbed her phone and turned, feeling sick.

"No, wait-" said Manila, but Raven ignored her, heading for the door. Behind her, Manila started arguing with Raja and Raven paused in the doorway, listening for a moment. Raja's voice was upset, and Manila's was imploring.

"You didn't give her a chance to explain-"

"To explain what? The huge invasion of privacy!? She sent it to _your fucking cousin,_ Manila-"

"But she didn't _know that-_ "

Raven shut the door behind her.

Raven didn't cry, because that wasn't something she did. But this horrible numb feeling was new. And that bad, bitchy part her mind was whispering to her, telling her that Raja and Manila shouldn't have been so upset. It was just a joke, it wasn't that big a deal. But deep down Raven knew it was, and that their response was reasonable and that she'd been a complete and absolute idiot. She'd broken any trust they'd had.

But even deeper than she knew that the kind of feelings she had for Raja and Manila didn't happen to her very often, if ever. She'd been really starting to care about them… but now they were definitely no longer interested. 

Because at the end of the day, Raven was an asshole of a person. And assholes deserve nothing but shit.

Before collapsing into bed she sent a single text to Jujubee.

_i fucked up for real this time_


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven doesn't really do apologies, but, well… there's a first time for everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter we finally get to meet jujubee in the flesh!! and then i wrote some filthy, filthy smut because readers rock and i love y'all. raven tries her hardest not to be such a total dick, some plot/emotional developments happen, but who cares about THAT when there's porn?! lmao enjoy ;)
> 
> cw: apologies, smut, squirting, double-penetration

"I'm not depressed."

"Sure," replied Jujubee, patiently, "But then why are we in your bed at five p.m. on a Wednesday, watching _Clueless?_ "

"It's a weeknight-"

"You've been like this for four days. You obviously haven't showered, I can smell you from here," said Jujubee, running a finger over Raven's blonde scalp, "This is the worst white girl hair grease situation I've ever seen!"

"Ugh, shut up!" groaned Raven, pulling the blanket higher around her while Cher Lloyd pouted on the screen of her laptop.

"You've gotta bounce back, Raven."

Raven was well aware that she was stewing, depressed and complaining. The problem was that she didn't know what to do about it. The… fight, break up, or whatever it had been with Raja and Manila was still circling in her mind. Manila's texts had piled up in her phone but Raven left them unread. Raja hadn't said anything.

"It's just that," began Raven, "I really liked them, you know? But I fucked it up because I'm such an asshole."

"Well, I can't deny that," chuckled Jujubee, "You are an asshole, you're literally the worst."

"Why did we even start doing that?" wondered Raven aloud, "The photo thing?"

Jujubee sighed and shifted, "I don't know. It was just a joke that got away from us, I guess. Seemed harmless at the time. You started it."

"No, you did!"

"It was you, bitch, I have receipts."

"Raja was right, it's fucked up," muttered Raven, wallowing in self-pity.

"Well, we've learned," said Jujubee, with a shrug, "I'll just give you elaborate descriptions of the next guy from the club instead of a photo, whatever, stop wallowing. If anyone else had called you on it you'd have just told them not to be so uptight and let it go. You actually care about how these two feel, and that's your problem here."

Raven stared at the screen. Cher Lloyd threw her hair over her shoulder.

"You actually wanted a relationship with them," prompted Jujubee, as though she were speaking to an especially slow child, "You were falling in love and shit."

"Yeah, I was," said Raven in a small voice. She hated to admit it. Usually she was a bad bitch, no feelings. But not today.

"Then you need to apologize."

Raven sighed. She didn't really _do_ apologies.

"If they accept it, then great. And sure, they might not but then at least you tried, right? Then you can move on, and not do any more of…" Jujubee plucked an empty Doritos bag from underneath a fold in the blanket, "… this."

"Okay fine, but I-"

There was a knock at the door. 

"Yeah?" called Raven.

Nicole poked her head into the room, "Hi Raven, sorry to interrupt, but you've got all these dishes in the sink…"

Raven resisted rolling her eyes. Nicole had been laying on it thick recently.

"I could wash them for you, since I'm about to wash mine anyway?" suggested Nicole.

"Sure, thank you," said Raven, "That would be great."

"Okay. I'll see you later," Nicole gave her a shy smile and shut the door. 

Jujubee gave Raven a _look._

"Bitch, you've got her doing your dishes?" demanded Jujubee, "You can't just use people like that!"

"I didn't ask her to do anything! I barely speak to her!"

"She's obviously got a huge crush on you-"

"But why is that _my problem-?_ "

"You know exactly what you're doing," said Jujubee, narrowing her eyes, "Bite the bullet Raven, grow up."

Raven held eye contact with Jujubee for a couple seconds and then looked away. Jujubee was right, of course, because Jujubee was always right. Jujubee always expected Raven to rise to the occasion, enjoying her at her best, tolerating her at her lowest and hauling her out of whatever holes Raven dug herself into. And Raven always responded to Jujubee's calls no matter how late it was, had helped her move several times and talked her through all the bullshit that went down when she attempted to date the various guys she hooked up with. Jujubee was her best (and if Raven was being honest, _only_ ) friend.

"You're right," admitted Raven, sitting up straighter, "I need to get my shit together. I'll let Nicole down easy. And I'll… apologize to Raja and Manila."

"Now that's what I wanna hear, bitch!" laughed Jujubee, poking Raven's arm affectionately, "Now let's go out and do something fun, 'cause you're boring me. But you need to wash your hair first."

-

Raven showered and washed her hair and went out with Jujubee and texted Manila back. The next day she went out and bought flowers, because she'd seen people do that in movies when they needed to apologize. Apologies did not come naturally to Raven.

After a few texts back and forth Manila stated that Raven could come by and say what she had to say. Raven sent off a text confirming, and then sighed. She put the bouquet on her bed and went into the kitchen. Nicole was there with her friend Kylie, sitting at the table and chatting over tea. Nicole turned to Raven and a smile broke out over her face. 

"Hi!" said Nicole, "We're just having tea, would you like to join us?"

"Actually, can I talk to you alone for a minute?" asked Raven, clasping her hands in front of her and cutting eyes at Kylie's suspicious expression. 

"Oh," replied Nicole, smile fading slightly, "Anything you wanna say you can say in front of Kylie, she's like family to me."

Kylie raised a triumphant eyebrow.

"Okay, fine," said Raven, irritated. She took a breath, promised herself not to be cruel and unclasped her hands. 

"Look, Nicole, I know you have a crush on me. I'm not interested," stated Raven, "There's nothing wrong with you, you're a great roommate and there's a lot of things I appreciate about you. But we're not going to be involved in any kind of romantic way. Okay?"

Nicole's face fell and Kylie sent Raven a glare as she reached across the table to take her friend's hand. 

"Oh, I- I didn't really expect that," said Nicole, pressing a hand to her chest and Raven immediately felt bad, but held her gaze. It had to be said. Nicole continued, "I, um. I did have a bit of a crush on you. But I guess if you're not interested then… you're not interested." She smiled awkwardly and Raven shifted her weight from one foot to the other. 

"Just didn't want you to waste your time," said Raven, nodding to Nicole and Kylie. Then she turned on her heel and left, because she had bigger fish to fry. Grabbing the bouquet from her bedroom before leaving the apartment, Raven threw her keys in her purse as she rushed out down the street to the subway.

Raven felt lighter, finally having spoken to Nicole should ease the tension in the apartment. But she had another, far more important conversation to have. She took a tiny mirror out of her purse and gazed into it.

At least her eyeliner was on point. 

-

Raven's trepidation grew as she walked the rest of the way up the street to Raja and Manila's building. But she rang up and soon enough she was in front of their apartment door. She knocked. 

Manila opened the door with a cautious expression. 

Raven thrust the bouquet at her.

"Uh," said Manila, shocked, taking the flowers, "Thank you?" 

Manila stepped back and walked through into the kitchen. Raven followed her in. Manila put the bouquet down and leaned back against the counter, arms crossed. 

Raja was sitting, imperious, at the kitchen table. Back straight, hands together, glaring sharply at Raven. It was almost funny. 

"So?" demanded Raja. 

"Raja-" sighed Manila.

"I'm really fucking sorry," said Raven, taking a breath. The word didn't come naturally to her, so she'd been practicing saying it in the mirror, but now it felt like she couldn't stop. "I'm sorry I took the photo without your consent and I'm sorry I sent it to Juju. It was so stupid and immature and I really wish I hadn't," she nodded to Raja, "I won't do anything like that ever again."

Manila was softening, looking at her with kind eyes. Raven tapped her fingers against her thigh, awaiting Raja's judgement. 

"Thank you for admitting that," said Raja slowly, "I can see you've realized how fucked up it was."

"Really fucked up," confirmed Raven.

"A huge invasion of our privacy, and an unnecessary risk."

"Totally, yeah."

From the corner of her eye, Raven noticed Manila getting a vase out from the cupboard. Manila stood up on her toes, reaching towards the top shelf. Her sweat pants hugged her butt and as she reached her shirt rode up, exposing the curve of her lower back. Raven looked quickly back to Raja. But Raja had noticed her watching, and her eyes narrowed, unimpressed.

"I," said Raven, clasping and unclasping her hands in front of her. Was this over yet? Manila placed the flowers in the vase on the counter, then walked back and sat at the table opposite of Raja, motioning for Raven to sit at the third chair at the end. Raven sat down, avoiding Raja's eyes. 

"Well," said Manila, glancing between the two of them, "Thank you for apologizing, Raven."

Raven nodded in acknowledgement and stayed quiet. Manila looked thoughtful. 

"I didn't realize that you considered us a just a hook-up," said Manila, picking at her nails, "I kind of thought it was becoming more than that. I really liked you."

"Well, it was at first, obviously," said Raven, taken off guard at Manila's straightforward way of expressing things, "But then, uh, I mean, it-" 

Damn that was unclear, but she was trying. This was her chance. How did normal people do this?

Raja rolled her eyes, impatient.

"But then we got to know each other, and I-" Raven paused, every instinct screaming at her not to admit it, never to show vulnerability, "I also thought it was becoming something more. I would like it to. If that's still possible."

Manila looked surprised and pleased, but Manila's emotions were always so open on her face. It wasn't the same with Raja, who's expression was impenetrable, even as she glanced between Raven and Manila. Raven found herself holding her breath. 

"Look, I just need you to understand," said Raja, "Maybe you grew up in some kind of safe accepting environment or whatever, but Manila didn't. We try to control what information Manila's family gets about our lives, because they can and will harass us."

"Right, but-"

"No," interrupted Raja, "That picture could be anywhere, and I don't like that."

"I swear Juju won't do anything with it, she deleted it a couple hours after she got it, I asked her-"

"But she's Manila's second cousin. She _could_ have shared it with other members of Manila's family, right? She could've easily made their harassment of us worse. You think we want the details of our sexual encounters to be shown off to the world?" Raja's voice was hard, but there was a tone of hurt underneath. "And you took it when we were asleep. How many times have you slept over here, now? You could have done anything, how can I possibly trust you?"

"Look, I-" managed Raven, guilt rolling in her stomach. She took out her phone, typed in the passcode and put it on the table between them, "You can go through it. There's nothing else."

But Raja ignored the phone, staring at her. Raven understood the depth of Raja's reaction, her more reserved nature combined with her protectiveness of Manila meant Raja was not forgiving this offence easily. 

"I need you to understand where we're coming from," said Raja, her eyes hard, "Especially if anything involving the three of us is going to continue."

"I understand, I _really_ do," said Raven, exhaling through her nose, "And I'm sorry." 

Raven didn't know what else she could do or say to help herself. Maybe this whole apology wasn't worth it. Maybe what she'd done was unforgivable. Maybe she should just accept that she was a total asshole, leave these people alone, give up on the idea of ever being in a relationship and go back to chasing tail at the club… 

"Raja," said Manila, leaning forward and taking Raja's hand across the table, "I know you want to protect me from my family, and like, everything in the world. But I don't think you need to protect me from Raven." Manila shot a brief smile her way. "Like she obviously knows it was a mistake, and she didn't know that Jujubee is my second cousin, that was just a weird coincidence. It was a shitty inside joke that went too far. She's not gonna do it again."

Raja relaxed slightly, giving Manila an affectionate look before turning her intense gaze back to Raven. 

"Well, if she _does_ do it again I will personally take her to court for the distribution of intimate images without the consent of the parties involved," said Raja, staring at Raven as Manila rolled her eyes, "I have some excellent lawyer friends-"

"Raja, will you stop threatening her in the third person? Bianca is an _immigration lawyer-_ "

"Uh," interrupted Raven, confused as to how the conversation had arrived at this point, "It's not going to happen again, seriously. So… do you two want me back or not?"

Manila laughed and got up from her chair to hug Raven, sitting down in her lap and kissing her forehead. 

"I missed you," whispered Manila, "I was so upset when you left. If you want to be with us I'd love it, and Raja will come around, she just needs a minute. She's sensitive like that."

It seemed to Raven that Manila was downplaying the situation. But that didn't stop Raven from tentatively wrapping her arms around Manila's waist and breathing in the smell of her hair. Raven peeked at Raja, who watched them both with an odd expression.

Manila carded her fingers through Raven's hair for a moment, and then kissed her, and Raven responded, a little surprised. Even more surprised when Manila deepened the kiss, delicately parting her lips with her tongue. 

"Wait, what's happening?" said Raven, pulling back and glancing from Manila's smile to Raja's half-guarded expression.

"I think you owe us apology sex," teased Manila, wiggling her hips in Raven's lap in a way that sent a curl of interest between Raven's legs. Hmm, it wasn't a _terrible_ idea… 

"Not tonight, babe," murmured Raja, reaching over to touch Manila's back, "That's not okay for me yet."

"Alright," said Manila, twisting to take Raja's hand and squeeze it, "When you're ready."

"Yeah," agreed Raven, eyes flicking between them. Relief was finally beginning to raise it's head… 

Manila got off of Raven's lap and walked over to the sink, humming. Raven adjusted her position, sitting up straight and crossing one leg over the other. 

Raja cleared her throat, and said, her low voice amused, "You're on probation, Raven."

"What? That's not a thing!" laughed Manila from by the sink.

Raven laughed cautiously. But it seemed like she was forgiven for now and things were looking up. She felt almost giddy as the relief flooded through her after the apology and serious, vulnerable conversation. But Raja and Manila were worth it, and Raven internally swore she was going to try to be a better person, she would figure to how to make this work. 

The cold bitch could stand to warm up.

-

It took a couple weeks of cautious stops and starts, but Raja came around. Raven finally relaxed around her again, her guilt at her mistake fading as she did the work to rebuild the couple's trust. Which meant being honest and consistent, and present and loving. None of which came naturally to her. Raven googled a lot of basic shit like _'how to communicate with your girlfriend(s)'_ and _'how to not be an asshole'_ and _'how to be in a throuple for real for a joke'_ and talking to Jujubee about it. Juju didn't really know anything either, but they were both trying. 

Manila was as affectionate as ever, especially since the three of them had actually stated, terrifyingly, out loud, they wanted to try a relationship. In fact, it was becoming increasingly difficult for Raven and Manila to resist Raja's no sex rule. However, Manila had sent Raven some interesting emojis this morning, along with a suggestion that she come by after work. It was a Friday.

So Raven did, after spending a lengthy period of time in the bathroom grooming herself to the nines. The apartment was much calmer these days, in fact Nicole's friend Kylie seemed to be spending much more time there, even sleeping over… but that was none of Raven's business, was it?

Soon enough, she was at Raja and Manila's place and Manila greeted her with her typical enthusiastic smile. Dinner was about to happen, which was ideal because Raven hadn't had time to eat, and she was invited to join them. They'd still been having dinner together and hanging out, but the energy was a little different tonight as they ate and chatted about their weeks.

Soon enough dinner was finished and the dishes were cleaned and put away and Manila was looking at Raven out of the corner of her eye in that very _particular_ way. Raven waited patiently, not showing her anticipation, even though she'd worn her good high-waisted leather mini-skirt for a _reason,_ and she took out her phone and looked at it.

It was Raja who made the first move. She snuck up behind Raven, circled her arms around her waist and said quietly into her ear, "I forgive you, your probation has been lifted."

Raven stiffened, instantly super fucking horny. Yes, _yes,_ finally.

Manila appeared in front of her, laughing, practically dancing with excitement, "We're gonna fu-uck! Like only if you want to obviously, because consent-"

"Oh my god, you're ridiculous," said Raven, as Raja began to kiss her neck, letting out a sigh of relief. "Of course I want to, it's only been me and my vibrator for like three weeks…"

"Please tell me all about that, in detail," purred Raja into her ear, gently pushing Raven's back as Manila took her hand and led her towards their bedroom.

Manila was on the bed first, pulling Raven on top of her and kissing her ferociously. Raven kissed her back with equal enthusiasm, excitement soaring in her chest as she pushed her thigh between Manila's legs and Manila rolled her hips against it with a whine that was getting Raven very, very interested. A shift on the mattress as Raja sat down next them, head cocked to one side, watching the proceedings with amusement. Raven sat up, straddling Manila and encouraging Manila's shirt off, and oh, Manila wasn't even wearing a bra, wasn't that _wonderfully convenient?_

Raven tore her own shirt up over her head, revealing her own bra, the one that happened to be a bit too small but she still liked it anyway. It was lacy black, and it had a two clasps in the front, which Raven went for, and-

"Wait, wait," said Raja, her eyes dark, "Let me."

Raven dropped her hands, and got off of Manila, sitting in front of Raja and waiting expectantly. Raja took her time, first moving in and running her finger along the edge of the bra, and then kissing the tops of Raven's breasts, one after the other, before unclasping at her bra. Raja sighed and stared hungrily at Raven's tits, before going to town with her hands and her mouth. 

"I forgot about her fetish," said Raven to Manila, who was watching the scene and removing her pants. 

"Yeah, it's hilarious."

"Shut up," muttered Raja, sucking on Raven's nipple, causing a shiver to pass over her body.

Raja continued for a few moments, as Raven became super turned on but also a little over-sensitive.

"Okay, stop," she said, and Raja leaned back. Manila was on Raja immediately, pushing her down on her back and fumbling with the buttons on her shirt. Raja laughed softly and stroked Manila's back.

"You're getting naked, _now,_ " giggled Manila, already completely buck-naked herself, beautiful and perfect, "You made us wait, so we're topping you tonight."

"If you say so," chuckled Raja in response.

Raven followed Manila's lead and undid Raja's belt, unzipped her fly and tugged her jeans down, as Raja raised her narrow hips to help. Mmm, Raja looked great in plain black cotton underwear. They suited her simple, androgynous style, and damn if Raven wasn't just about ready to take them off. 

Raja started to tickle Manila, who laughed and squirmed, joy emanating from her body, and she fumbled with the buttons on Raja's shirt. Raven moved up to help her, swatting at Raja's opposite hand as it snuck around Raven's side in attempt to tickle her. Nobody got to tickle Raven.

Finally, Raja's shirt, undershirt and bra were off and her warm skin was free for Raven to kiss, everywhere. There was something about the taste of Raja's neck that made Raven want to curl up and live there forever.

It was unusual for Raja be on the receiving end during sex, but she was relaxed, her long body languid underneath Raven and Manila's ministrations, little breaths leaving her mouth. Manila moved down Raja's body, kissing her stomach, and then peeled Raja's underwear down her hips, biting her lip in anticipation.

"Gently," murmured Raja. 

"I know, baby," murmured Manila in response, before kissing the inside of Raja's thighs. Raven moved up, and kissed Raja, slipping her tongue into her mouth and pressing Raja's head back into the pillow. Raja's hand found Raven's chest again, cupping her breast and playing with her nipple, until Raja gave a short gasp. Raven glanced down, saw Manila's curly head of hair moving nodding up and down as she ate Raja out, and flashed a moment of mischievous eye contact with Raven. Pure fire shot down between Raven's legs. 

Raja made little noises, her eyes shut, so Raven went back to kissing her, enjoying herself, trying to ignore how badly she wanted, needed, to be touched… she'd missed this so much. There was something so intimate and special about Raja making herself so vulnerable. Raja was often protective, dominant, even closed off, but right now she was-

"Mmm, could you… " murmured Raja, breaking the kiss and lifting her head, "Could you switch?"

Raven glanced down at Manila, who had raised her head, lips and chin glistening, pure mischief in her expression. Raven crawled down the bed to lie down between Raja's legs, trading off with Manila. Raven hesitated for a moment, suddenly nervous. But she hadn't spent half of her life eating pussy to be _bad at it._

With that, Raven went in. And since Manila had done the groundwork, it didn't take much until Raja was biting her lip and moaning and arching her back, and asking Raven to finger her, which Raven _most generously_ did, slipping two fingers inside of her and curling them, seeking out the spot that would make Raja lose her mind. 

Raven found it, earning a loud moan from Raja and her back arched even more. Raven kept at it, Raja's gasps coming loud, faster, Manila murmuring something in Raja's ear. 

"Fuck, I'm gonna have a heart attack-" gasped Raja. 

Momentarily panicked, Raven stopped and looked up, but Manila quickly said, "She's not- she's not, keep going-"

Raven did, and all of a sudden there was liquid coming out of Raja, getting all over Raven's face, in her mouth and on her chin and the bed, and Raja drew in a final ragged breath and whimpered and her body relaxed. Raven sat back up, wiping her face, extremely pleased with herself, and amazed to have experienced Raja's body in such a way. Raja covered her face with her hands, trying to steady her breath, and rolled onto her side. Manila stroked Raja's shoulder, as Raja shivered.

"Did you know she could do that?" asked Raven.

"Yes," replied Manila, with an evil smirk, "It doesn't happen every time, but _yes._ "

"Can you please fucking cuddle me?" groaned Raja, still hiding her face. Raven shrugged and lay down, spooning Raja and kissing the back of her shoulder. 

"That was awesome," whispered Raven, "You ruined my makeup though."

Raja growled an indecipherable complaint.

"Yeah, she's gonna need like five minutes," added Manila, from Raja's opposite side. 

Raven didn't think about anything, she just cuddled against Raja's back and wondered if this was what that whole being-in-a-relationship thing was supposed to feel like.

After a few minutes, Manila asked Raja if she was okay and Raja nodded and Manila surged up with her typical insurmountable energy and climbed on top of Raven and said, "My turn."

Raven slapped her ass, very satisfied by Manila's little yelp and sat up, running her hands down Manila's back. Irritated that she was still wearing her skirt and underwear, Raven went for the zipper but Manila batted her hands away, straddling Raven's lap. 

"I want to you to fuck me," whined Manila, bouncing so that her small tits jiggled and her curly hair moved, her pussy pressed against the leather of Raven's skirt. Raven tangled her hands in Manila's hair and pulled her head back, gently. Manila let out a tiny moan in response, and Raven pulled a little harder, until Manila's back arched.

"Ask nicely."

"Please fuck me, I wanna ride your fingers-"

Well, one didn't get asked for that every day so Raven kissed Manila's neck in response, sucking hard and knowing she'd leave a mark. Raven moved one hand from her hair to pinch Manila's nipple, and Manila let out a filthy moan that caused Raja to raise her head with interest, next to them. Raven maintained her grip on Manila's hair, careful not to actually hurt her. Manila responded to this very positively, whining and rolling her hips. Raven snuck her hand down underneath Manila, stroking her soaking pussy and easily slipping two fingers inside of her. Manila rode her hand, hanging on to Raven's shoulders, her eyes shut and her mouth open, loud and expressive.

And then suddenly Raja was up, moving in to kneel behind Manila, flashing a second eye contact with Raven over Manila's shoulder. 

"Baby, do you want me to-?" whispered Raja into Manila's ear, and she nodded. 

"Just, get the-" she panted, "Lube-"

"I've already got it."

Raven glanced around Manila, who was taking up most of her vision, and noticed Raja slicking her fingers with lube, and then Manila stilled, and Raja moved in so that she was flush against Manila's back, the three of them very close together. But, as always, Manila loved the attention and the heavy stimulation, and Raja slipped her hand underneath her and Raven realized that Raja wasn't going for Manila's pussy. 

Oh, hell yeah.

Raja slid her lube-slicked finger into Manila's asshole, and Manila's entire body seemed to stiffen for a second and then she ground down even harder, furiously riding their fingers. Raja kissed her neck, and Raven followed her lead, sucking on Manila's collarbone even as her wrist was starting to get sore from the angle and the pressure. 

Manila was practically shouting, so loud were her gasps and moans, and it wasn't long until she she came, her face and her neck flushed pink. Raja slid her finger out first, gently, and then Raven followed suit. Raven let go of Manila's hair with her opposite hand, allowing her to slump forward into a hug, shivering with pleasure, mumbling incoherent praise into Raven's ear. The warm feeling had settled under Raven's ribs once again, but her pussy fucking ached, she was so aroused it was painful. Raven lay back, and cradled Manila as she came down from the orgasm. Raja lay down beside them, stroking her back. There was silence.

Raven briefly considered the fact that she was still wearing her skirt and underwear. The skirt was now definitely stained. Hmm. It was entirely possible that Raven wasn't going to get much attention tonight, but now that everything was back to normal and _better,_ there'd be other times. She definitely needed a shower after this and could easily finish herself in there. Tonight was about re-building Raja and Manila's trust after all, and Raven figured she was getting there… 

"I'm gonna shower," she murmured into Manila's ear. 

"That's a great idea," sighed Manila.

Well, that confirmed it. Raven untangled herself from Manila and got up off the bed. She could leave the couple alone to recover, and then re-join them when she was clean, and sleep over, if that was what they had in mind. Raven stole out of the bedroom into the bathroom and quickly turned the shower tap so it ran hot and stripped out of her tight skirt and underwear, _finally._ Raven stepped under the warm flow of water, lathering up the soap in her hands.

And then she heard the door click. Raven peeked around the curtain and saw Raja and Manila enter the small room, still entirely naked.

"Well hello," said Raven, the warm feeling under her ribs turning hot.

"Did you really think we were going to let you shower all by yourself?" purred Raja, flicking the curtain aside and stepping through, soaping up her hands and going directly for Raven's tits.

"Especially after you were so good to us?" yawned Manila, joining them, "Oh, sorry. I'm sleepy."

The warm, hot feeling sharply descended, parking itself right between Raven's legs where she'd been waiting all evening and she sighed contentedly. She really didn't deserve these people. Raja kissed her neck, playing with her soapy tits and Manila hugged her around the waist, her hand questing until she was stroking gently between Raven's legs and the warm water streamed over all three of them and everything was soft and good.

Soon enough Raven found herself coming for the third time, one leg up on the shower's ledge, leaning back against Raja, who was kissing her neck and practically holding her up because her knees had gone weak. Manila was kneeling between her legs, her tongue in Raven's pussy, and her thumb rubbing perfect, rapid circles on her clit.

Raven was invited to sleep over, once everyone was clean and dry. As she cuddled in between the couple, surprising contentedness stole over her. 

Perhaps falling in love wouldn't be as much of a problem as she'd originally anticipated. 

-

"Bitch, you dodged a bullet," said Jujubee, after hearing the whole story a few days later. They were sharing a sneaky cigarette outside of Raven's building. The elderly lady that lived in the apartment underneath Raven's glared down at them through her window. Raven gave her a polite nod and turned away.

"Yeah I know, I'm actually so lucky," mused Raven, glancing down at her phone. Manila had texted her. "They're on their way."

"Can't believe I'm about to reconnect with my estranged second cousin who's banging my best friend," laughed Jujubee, passing the cigarette back to Raven, "And that we're all going to the beach. This is gonna be so stupid."

"Hey, we're not just banging, this is a real relationship," protested Raven, inhaling the last of the rare and precious smoke, "I like, love them."

"Aw, that's cute. You told them yet?"

"No…"

"Girl."

Raven extinguished the cigarette against the brick wall and tossed the butt at a public garbage across the sidewalk. Perhaps she'd manage to say it to Raja and Manila, sometime soon. That would be another terrifying step.

"Wait, is that them?" asked Jujubee, as Raja's terrible 90's green car approached, "That thing is ancient, we're going to die today."

Manila had her head out of the passenger window and was wearing a pretty headband and a huge grin, waving. The car pulled up, and Raja peered at them through the windshield, pushing her sunglasses on her head, wrist draped over the steering wheel. 

"Yeah, that's them," confirmed Raven, picking up their bags and approaching the car. She kissed Manila on the cheek and waved through the window to Raja. Jujubee and Manila greeted each other and Raven threw their stuff in the trunk before climbing into the back with Jujubee. 

Manila twisted in the front seat, seatbelt cutting across her chest, talking to Jujubee at a mile a minute. Apparently they had a lot to catch up on. 

Raja eyed Raven in the rearview mirror with a knowing smile, and Raven rolled her eyes affectionately. Jujubee and Manila chatted away to each other. Raja flicked her sunglasses back down and moved the car out into the road, her confident, tattooed hands manoeurvering the stick shift and the wheel. The sun hit the dash and backlit Manila until her hair glowed.

Raven hid her mouth with her hand, because she was smiling like a love-struck idiot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks so much for reading <3


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